Someone accidentally sent me this over Twitter a few hours ago:
OK. So I know a Private Detective in T Wells and he spends all his time photographing people cheating on their spouses.
And a minute later he wrote:
I'm so sorry. I meant to send that to someone else. Glad you're getting the Z. Think that may change when he or she is born.
Technology is amazing.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
The Greek Parade!
How have I lived in Manhattan for 10 years and I've never seen the Greek Parade? I'm the biggest fan of ethnically-themed parades -- Israeli Day, Puerto Rican Day, you know it, I'm there, and not just for the food. As if I needed another reason to want a Fifth Avenue apartment -- think of the view I would for all the festivities! The Greeks put on a quality parade. It was also a nice exercise is shooting moving objects -- with a camera -- which I don't often get to do.
The biggest surprise was when I stumbled across the parade and after about 10 minutes a float from the Pontian Society of Norwalk, CT came by. I'm from Norwalk so it was a bizarre source of pride. Go Norwalk!
Their float was a giant fishing boat -- with a million people on it. All cousins?
The little girl in the middle has had enough of the this Greek stuff.
Some Greek goddesses were on hand, naturally.
The costumes were the best part.
The commentary on the PA systems was all in Greek. I love how it was assumed that if you were there you spoke Greek. Awesome.
The biggest surprise was when I stumbled across the parade and after about 10 minutes a float from the Pontian Society of Norwalk, CT came by. I'm from Norwalk so it was a bizarre source of pride. Go Norwalk!
Their float was a giant fishing boat -- with a million people on it. All cousins?
The little girl in the middle has had enough of the this Greek stuff.
Some Greek goddesses were on hand, naturally.
The costumes were the best part.
The commentary on the PA systems was all in Greek. I love how it was assumed that if you were there you spoke Greek. Awesome.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Best. Baby Shower. Evs.
The greatest baby shower in the history of time was thrown yesterday afternoon in honor of my little bean. I was overwhelmed by everyone's generosity, to say the least. Peeps came from all over the tri-state area, and were insanely generous. Thanks again everyone who came out to Old Greenwich! It was a perfect day for a party and mimosas.
Gorgeous, sunny room
Avec fleurs, bien sur.
Meghan et moi. Old friend from the fourth grade and genius cake maker. Order from her!
I really like this pic of Carey, Erin et Jen
Erin, Jen, Carey et moi.
Jill et Jen
Kim et Jenny! I don't know what's going on with all backlight.
Everyone out on the terrace! With mimosas!
Cousin Sam et moi
The gang's all here!
My attractive and -- mostly single -- friends. Hear that, fellas?
The boot-ay. I'm still totally overwhelmed by it all.
La Madre made sure to wear animal prints, so that she was easily identifiable.
The Russian relatives in Chicago sent over safari themed bedding! Thanks! Lions and tigers and giraffes!
There was a rock star theme to some of the clothes. Because my kid, will, in fact, be a rock star.
Goodies! And a Bugaboo!
Behold the Bugaboo! I am now officially a Manhattan Mama!
The Mercedes of strollers. Oh, and that dress is not maternity. I've had it for over a year. I refuse to wear maternity clothes. Gauche!
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Saturday, April 18, 2009
An Afternoon On The Lower East Side
It was a good day in the East Village trying to find a new place for a client. We ended up finding a sick two bedroom for $2600, which totally made his day.
Along the way there was all sorts of neat stuff to see. Naturally, I took some snaps.
I think these two are the Waldorf and Statler of Clinton Street
You know you've arrived as a barber when you have your own bi-colored neon sign.
I want this on a T-shirt
Sign of the times?
Another Silly New York Times Real Estate Piece
The New York Times is probably the last place I would look for any kind of real estate advice. Why? Because journalists don't work in the industry, they just report about it. They aren't privy to the nuances of deals or day to day life in the industry. They find a few examples of what they're looking for and they write a piece off of it. They mix up data, most notably about the state of rental prices. This piece, about real estate being a taboo subject, is as ridiculous as it gets.
Real estate was never intended as a short-term investment, which is unfortunately how it has been perceived over the last five years or so. Even if you bought a place in Manhattan and you paid one of those high prices, relax. If you really want to see a return on a real estate investment, you should hang on for about 10 years or so. Some people would say five, but it depends largely on what you bought and where. Think about all the people who bought in Manhatttan the 1980s, had to live through the recession of the early 1990s and then sold in the late 1990s and made a profit. We're facing almost the same thing now.
In the wise words of Kenny Rogers: know when to hold 'em and know when to fold 'em. Right now: hold. It's all you can do. And stop complaining about the market. Believe it or not, people are still buying and selling places everyday. They're just not doing it for sport the way we were a year or two ago.
Don't Even Say The Words
Real estate was never intended as a short-term investment, which is unfortunately how it has been perceived over the last five years or so. Even if you bought a place in Manhattan and you paid one of those high prices, relax. If you really want to see a return on a real estate investment, you should hang on for about 10 years or so. Some people would say five, but it depends largely on what you bought and where. Think about all the people who bought in Manhatttan the 1980s, had to live through the recession of the early 1990s and then sold in the late 1990s and made a profit. We're facing almost the same thing now.
In the wise words of Kenny Rogers: know when to hold 'em and know when to fold 'em. Right now: hold. It's all you can do. And stop complaining about the market. Believe it or not, people are still buying and selling places everyday. They're just not doing it for sport the way we were a year or two ago.
Don't Even Say The Words
The Dogs Of 79th Street
At least once a day on 79th Street I see this outside one of the buildings: one or two kids taking about about 15 large dogs for a walk. It's a funny sight, since it seems that when you live in this building you're issued a large, 50-pound dog of your choice. I like the Burmese Mountain dogs, personally.
Friday, April 17, 2009
La Pauline: Now A Font!
I have never looked at font with lust in my eye -- that's TR's department -- but last night I found a font called -- Pauline!
Narcissism aside, you have to understand the significance of this. When one goes through life with a name like Pauline, you struggle to find anything mass produced with your name on it. Growing up, I never had Pauline pencils or barettes like the other girls. No one has ever written a song called Pauline, either. Sometimes when my dad came home from France he would has some little trinket, like a necklace or a ceramic box. Pauline is a big name in France. Stateside, it's up there with all the other old lady names, like Ernestine and Marge. Everyone thinks it's a nice middle name, since their grandmother was likely named Pauline. I say if you're going to give your kid a name like Pauline, it should be front and center, not hidden on an obscure line on a birth certificate. Own the Pauline!
But now, at least I have a font. And it looks exactly the way I think a Pauline font should look -- with just a hint of naivete!
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Landlords: They Say The Darndest Things!
A colleague of mine, we'll call him George, had a client who need a studio. The budget was around $1500 a month, not big at all in Manhattan, and it had to be a no fee apartment. A background check on the client revealed that he'd had some non-payment of rent issues in the past and in New Jersey he "may or may not have caused a small fire" in a building where he once lived. While most brokers would have written the client off, George was committed to finding him a place.
Eventually, George did, in a studio in upper Chelsea owned by a guy named Big Nick. Big Nick was an obese, 60-something Greek man who hung out in his restaurant all day long, and was always happy when ladies came to see his properties. He was a sweet man, but always wanted to get to know his tenants a little bit before they signed leases.
A few days before Easter, George brought his client over to see Big Nick and hand over the paperwork.
"Are you going away for Easter?" Big Nick asked the client in heavily accented English.
"Easter?" The client asked. "No, I'm not going away. I'm staying here in Manhattan."
Big Nick looked at the client quizzically. "Tell me," he said, and waved his hand in front of his crotch, "Are you...circumcised?"
George wanted to bury his face in the paperwork. But Big Nick wasn't finished.
"I'll tell you what," Big Nick said. "If you don't pay your rent, it's OK. We'll just throw you in the river. You understand, yes?"
George was convinced his deal had just fallen apart, but Big Nick assured the client he could have the lopsided $1500 studio.
Out on the street, George tried to do damage control. "I'm so sorry about Big Nick. He's a very sweet man. He's just kind of old school, you know?"
The client smiled. "Are you kidding me? That guy is awesome! I'll have checks for you tomorrow!"
And there you have it: another successful landlord/tenant match.
Eventually, George did, in a studio in upper Chelsea owned by a guy named Big Nick. Big Nick was an obese, 60-something Greek man who hung out in his restaurant all day long, and was always happy when ladies came to see his properties. He was a sweet man, but always wanted to get to know his tenants a little bit before they signed leases.
A few days before Easter, George brought his client over to see Big Nick and hand over the paperwork.
"Are you going away for Easter?" Big Nick asked the client in heavily accented English.
"Easter?" The client asked. "No, I'm not going away. I'm staying here in Manhattan."
Big Nick looked at the client quizzically. "Tell me," he said, and waved his hand in front of his crotch, "Are you...circumcised?"
George wanted to bury his face in the paperwork. But Big Nick wasn't finished.
"I'll tell you what," Big Nick said. "If you don't pay your rent, it's OK. We'll just throw you in the river. You understand, yes?"
George was convinced his deal had just fallen apart, but Big Nick assured the client he could have the lopsided $1500 studio.
Out on the street, George tried to do damage control. "I'm so sorry about Big Nick. He's a very sweet man. He's just kind of old school, you know?"
The client smiled. "Are you kidding me? That guy is awesome! I'll have checks for you tomorrow!"
And there you have it: another successful landlord/tenant match.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Meet Romeo. He's 20 Years Old
Yesterday after picking up some keys to show a place to some clients, I walked by a pet shop on Christopher Street and noticed this guy through the window. He's a orangey/buff Persian, like other cats I have had, and he was just relaxing on the front counter.
The shop owner told me that his name was Romeo and that he was 20 years old. He lived in the shop, has lots of gourmet food to choose from and likes it when customers stop in to give him a scritch. Don't be fooled, under all the gorgeous fur is not a lot of actual cat. He is literally just fur and bones.
Like any happy cat, Romeo has a friend who lives with him in the store. Zonked out on a shelf was a huge tabby, who when stretched out looked about two feet long, and could have been mistaken for a doorstop. The tabby's name was...Valentino.
An orange Persian and a domestic short hair who live together in harmony? I know that combination well.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Thursday, April 09, 2009
Classic SoHo Loft On Prince Street -- $3650 No Fee
Right on Prince and West Broadway there is a huge, one bedroom loft available immediately. $3650, no fee and has a washer/dryer. Central air, hardwood floors and great closets.
Full specs here:
Very sunny with deco fireplace
New kitchen has dishwasher
Sunny bath with large tub.
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Stories From The Real Estate Trenches
It was a doozy of a week over here on Planet Pauline. Two deals closed, but not without a little drama thrown in, just to keep life interesting. For every easy deal I close I get at least a pair that are breach birth. They come out eventually, but not without a little heave-ho.
The Mysterious Landlord/Tenant Complaint
I had a pair of clients, a couple, who were the coolest and nicest people ever. They had two criteria: outdoor space and a place that would take a large, lovable pooch. The first two apartments they loved were snapped up quickly, but eventually they found a place smack in the middle of Chelsea that had a terrace that could literally double as a dog run.
They're both employed and make a great living, so I figured it would be easy to close. Not so fast. The leasing agent at the luxury building they applied to called me and asked what the tenant/landlord complaint that was popping up on his credit report was all about.
"The which?" I asked. "They never mentioned any problems with a landlord."
"Most people don't," the leasing agent said smugly. "This needs to be cleared up, in writing, pronto. Otherwise I have someone else in line for the place."
And thus began a day and half long battle to get someone from my client's chop shop management company in Long Island to send a signed letter that stated that he was a good tenant and the tenant/landlord complaint in the City Clerk's office was based on a misunderstanding.
As the story goes, in 2007 my client was working abroad but still paying for his empty apartment in Manhattan. He paid in three month chunks, and one check was late getting across the pond. As is typical with many management companies, instead of calling him and asking him if something was wrong, accounting automatically forwarded the unpaid account to legal, who in turn filed a complaint with the City Clerk. My client should have received something in writing about the complaint, but doesn't remember getting one. They usually look like this.
After much back and forth we got someone to fax over a quick letter, my client was approved and the lease signing was all hugs and smiles, as they often are. The larger issue is getting the complaint erased from the City Clerk's office, since if it showed up on a credit check for a rental, it will most likely come up again if he applies for a mortgage. These days, you don't want anything trivial to stop you from getting a mortgage.
Moral of the story: If you ever have an issue with a landlord, even one like an accidental missed rent payment, make sure you address it immediately and get any resolution in writing. I don't know what we would have done if my client hadn't gotten this place. We'd probably be out looking right now.
No Children, No Pets, No Actual Apartment!
For a few weeks I had a listing for a two bedroom up by Columbia. It wasn't the grandest apartment that ever existed, but for a pair of students or someone looking for a deal, $2000 a month was a good price for 700 square feet.
It showed over and over, but since it wasn't renovated and the floors were industrial-grade tile, no one was biting. Until Monday night! A broker from another company called and said she was zipping over an application. The applicants were a working class family of four, with two young sons. I was excited and called the owner, who I was sure would be over the moon that her little dump was finally rented. Not so much.
"That's no good," Ramona, the owner said. "I told you that I don't want a family in there. I want two young professionals, preferably girls."
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "You can't not rent to someone because they're a family," I said. "That's against every Fair Housing Law known to man."
"It's not big enough for a family," she said.
"It's 700 square feet. It's plenty," I said. "They're financially qualified, have good credit and can move in this weekend."
"Is this how it works with brokers?" she asked. "You tell me who I should rent to?"
"In this case, yes," I said.
Then she dropped the bigger bomb: When she came into the office to give me the listing back in March, she said that even though the unit was in a co-op, there was no board approval. True, there are buildings like this, especially in slightly dumpier parts of town. Since the unit was being shown as often as it was, it got the attention of the board president, who called Ramona to see what was up. Seems that good old Ramona never cleared renting the place out with the board, who are now hot on her tail. She claims ignorance, which I don't buy for a second considering that she's a CPA. If there's anyone who reads the rules on the back of the boardgame's box, it's a CPA.
Within minutes of hanging up with Ramona I e-mailed our listings department and pulled the listing. Her keys are waiting at the front desk of my office, which oddly she hasn't picked up. (Maybe she's too busy wiping the egg off her face.) So even if she hadn't discriminated against the family of four, whoever moved in there would have likely been tossed out in a few months time. Klassy.
The day after Ramona wouldn't rent to the family, I got a called from yet another broker who had two young girls who wanted the place, deposit and application in hand. Maybe a lesser broker would have sent their app to Ramona, but knowing what I knew, that it was an illegal co-op sublet, I told him it was off the market. No commission was worth the headache I would face when those girls were tossed out in a few months.
If I could drink, I'd be doused in Bordeaux right now. Maybe even a bottle from 1982.
The Mysterious Landlord/Tenant Complaint
I had a pair of clients, a couple, who were the coolest and nicest people ever. They had two criteria: outdoor space and a place that would take a large, lovable pooch. The first two apartments they loved were snapped up quickly, but eventually they found a place smack in the middle of Chelsea that had a terrace that could literally double as a dog run.
They're both employed and make a great living, so I figured it would be easy to close. Not so fast. The leasing agent at the luxury building they applied to called me and asked what the tenant/landlord complaint that was popping up on his credit report was all about.
"The which?" I asked. "They never mentioned any problems with a landlord."
"Most people don't," the leasing agent said smugly. "This needs to be cleared up, in writing, pronto. Otherwise I have someone else in line for the place."
And thus began a day and half long battle to get someone from my client's chop shop management company in Long Island to send a signed letter that stated that he was a good tenant and the tenant/landlord complaint in the City Clerk's office was based on a misunderstanding.
As the story goes, in 2007 my client was working abroad but still paying for his empty apartment in Manhattan. He paid in three month chunks, and one check was late getting across the pond. As is typical with many management companies, instead of calling him and asking him if something was wrong, accounting automatically forwarded the unpaid account to legal, who in turn filed a complaint with the City Clerk. My client should have received something in writing about the complaint, but doesn't remember getting one. They usually look like this.
After much back and forth we got someone to fax over a quick letter, my client was approved and the lease signing was all hugs and smiles, as they often are. The larger issue is getting the complaint erased from the City Clerk's office, since if it showed up on a credit check for a rental, it will most likely come up again if he applies for a mortgage. These days, you don't want anything trivial to stop you from getting a mortgage.
Moral of the story: If you ever have an issue with a landlord, even one like an accidental missed rent payment, make sure you address it immediately and get any resolution in writing. I don't know what we would have done if my client hadn't gotten this place. We'd probably be out looking right now.
No Children, No Pets, No Actual Apartment!
For a few weeks I had a listing for a two bedroom up by Columbia. It wasn't the grandest apartment that ever existed, but for a pair of students or someone looking for a deal, $2000 a month was a good price for 700 square feet.
It showed over and over, but since it wasn't renovated and the floors were industrial-grade tile, no one was biting. Until Monday night! A broker from another company called and said she was zipping over an application. The applicants were a working class family of four, with two young sons. I was excited and called the owner, who I was sure would be over the moon that her little dump was finally rented. Not so much.
"That's no good," Ramona, the owner said. "I told you that I don't want a family in there. I want two young professionals, preferably girls."
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "You can't not rent to someone because they're a family," I said. "That's against every Fair Housing Law known to man."
"It's not big enough for a family," she said.
"It's 700 square feet. It's plenty," I said. "They're financially qualified, have good credit and can move in this weekend."
"Is this how it works with brokers?" she asked. "You tell me who I should rent to?"
"In this case, yes," I said.
Then she dropped the bigger bomb: When she came into the office to give me the listing back in March, she said that even though the unit was in a co-op, there was no board approval. True, there are buildings like this, especially in slightly dumpier parts of town. Since the unit was being shown as often as it was, it got the attention of the board president, who called Ramona to see what was up. Seems that good old Ramona never cleared renting the place out with the board, who are now hot on her tail. She claims ignorance, which I don't buy for a second considering that she's a CPA. If there's anyone who reads the rules on the back of the boardgame's box, it's a CPA.
Within minutes of hanging up with Ramona I e-mailed our listings department and pulled the listing. Her keys are waiting at the front desk of my office, which oddly she hasn't picked up. (Maybe she's too busy wiping the egg off her face.) So even if she hadn't discriminated against the family of four, whoever moved in there would have likely been tossed out in a few months time. Klassy.
The day after Ramona wouldn't rent to the family, I got a called from yet another broker who had two young girls who wanted the place, deposit and application in hand. Maybe a lesser broker would have sent their app to Ramona, but knowing what I knew, that it was an illegal co-op sublet, I told him it was off the market. No commission was worth the headache I would face when those girls were tossed out in a few months.
If I could drink, I'd be doused in Bordeaux right now. Maybe even a bottle from 1982.
Sunday, April 05, 2009
Every Little Step: The Documentary About A Chorus Line
My obsession with A Chorus Line is well documented. You can imagine my glee this weekend, then, when I started seeing posters for Every Little Step, a documentary about the making of the revival of A Chorus Line.
It's genius: It's a documentary about the making of a Broadway show, that's about the making of a Broadway show. It's so meta it makes your head spin.
Here's the official trailer:
And another version:
It's genius: It's a documentary about the making of a Broadway show, that's about the making of a Broadway show. It's so meta it makes your head spin.
Here's the official trailer:
And another version:
Friday, April 03, 2009
Lion Cubs In New Jersey!
I found this on You Tube today -- lion cubs being raised by a vet in New Jersey!
How cute are their little roars? These guys totally upstage Peppe and Valentino.
Thursday, April 02, 2009
At Least I Still Have My Health
In light of the recent unpleasantness with the Murray Hill co-op board, I was reminded of a song Bette Midler sings in the movie Beaches. It's a little jazz ditty called, "I've Still Got My Health."
When one is faced with the absence of logic, and co-op boards aren't known for being logical, just difficult, I like to blare this on my iPod.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
